GUYS



Awareness List for Nice Guys


As a male in this society, you can either be a part of the problem of abuse of women, or you can work towards becoming part of the solution. Begin looking and confronting the behaviors and language that you and those around you use when talking about, to, or with women and girls. Seriously consider how what you say and do might have the potential to be harmful and how to be helpful. 


Some things to consider...

  • Always interrupt any buddy you see violating -- verbally or physically -- a woman's space.
  • Don't join in if friends are paying unwanted sexual attention to a women at a party, in a bar, or on the street.
  • Don't ogle, whistle at, talk to, or look over women in ways that make them feel uncomfortable. If you aren't sure what makes a woman feel uncomfortable, ask her. 
  • When a woman says "no," believe her. Never imagine "no" means "maybe" or "yes". No means no. Always
  • Never think a woman owes a man sex, under any circumstances. Sexual intercourse is not payback for an expensive meal or an evening out on the town. 

* Adapted from the Coalition Against Sexual Harassment and Assault

She might be pregnant. She needs you to be there to support her.

If you are wondering how...we can help.

What NOT to Do

  • Do NOT bail. Do not run from this responsibility. That will only make things harder for everyone.
  • Do NOT pressure her. You will both need to work together to come to a decision you won't regret.
  • Do NOT forget that you are a very important person in this decision. Share your thoughts with respect to the enormity of the situation.

What you can DO

  • Stay calm. She needs your support now more than ever. 
  • Be there for her. Right now, you both have the responsibility to make an informed decision. You may have more influence on her decision than even her parents or friends.
  • Communicate honestly. It's normal to be nervous, frustrated, thrilled and more. Don't keep your thoughts bottled up. You will be surprised that you may share the same concerns. 
  • Educate yourself. You have options. Be informed.
  • Talk with people who care. Tell your trusted friends, parents, advisors. Hiding the news can only add to the stress.